Thunderf00t: Cesium, the most reactive Alkalai metal

The Truth About Gun Control

Overcriminilization

Think about it – there are now so many laws and regulations which carry a criminal penalty (in the US, as per the video below, but elsewhere, too) that the federal government bureaucrats say they don’t have enough manpower to list them all in a central database where citizens could easily access them.  The obvious implication of this is that most citizens are not aware of what the laws they live under and thus may infringe them many times a day without being aware of it.  (This is the topic of the video below.)

But, take it a step further:  consider the widespread supervision of the government of each and every citizen….now, it is clear that it is not a tinfoil-hat-conspiracy-talk, but reality we are living every day.

Then, remember how top bureaucrats are implicated in directing other bureaucrats to target the Obama regime’s political opponents.  So far, only the IRS department is implicated, but it would be highly naive to think this form of corruption is limited to only one department.

So, if you want to target a person disliked by the Obama regime, you just have to pull up all the records of their activities, compare them to obscure criminal regulations and voila, your political opponent gets sent to jail for a criminal misconduct….no need for ‘political prisoners’.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the game is played!

 

 

Pat Condell: A word to left-wing students

Hubble finds a new Neptune moon

Exciting news!

‘NASA’s Hubble Space Telescope has discovered a new moon orbiting the distant blue-green planet Neptune. This brings the number of known satellites circling the giant planet to 14.

The body is estimated to be no more than 12 miles across, making it the smallest known moon in the Neptunian system. It’s so small that it escaped detection by NASA’s Voyager 2 spacecraft, which flew by Neptune in 1989 and surveyed the planet’s system of moons and rings.’

Read the full press-release here.

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Returning to civilization

Finally – internet!!!

It has taken me a while, but I am slowly beginning to catch up on what has been happening in the world over the last week.

And while I did not get to see a live white moose (not albino), even though I was deep in ‘white moose country‘, I did manage to get a shot of the next best thing:

 

IMG_20130710_123439

Note – this is not a hunting trophy, as white moose are protected.  This particular unlucky guy died in a train accident.

Sunday’s joke

Shamelessly lifted from reddit:

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are on a camping trip.

In the middle of the night, Holmes nudges Watson awake, and says, “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

“I see millions of stars, my dear Holmes.”

“And what do you infer from seeing these stars?”

“Well, a number of things,” he says, lighting his pipe:

Astronomically, I observe that there are millions of galaxies and billions of stars and planets.

Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.

Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.

Meteorologically, I expect that the weather will be fine and clear.

Theologically, I see that God is all-powerful, and man, his creation, small and insignificant.

What about you, Holmes?”

“I infer that someone has stolen our tent!”

Yes, I have been neglecting artists.  Let me fix that:

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?  Two:  one to pet the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with clocks.

While on light-bulb jokes:

How many software engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?  None – that’s a hardware problem!

Saturday’s joke

Shamelessly lifted from reddit:

A physicist, a biologist and a mathematician are sitting outside of a bar when two men walk into the house across the road…

Ten minutes later, three men walk out.

The physicist looks confused and says “There must an error in the measurements.”

The biologist retorts “No, they must have reproduced!”

To which the mathematician says “If one person goes inside, the house will be empty.”

An oldie, but a goodie:

An optimist will say that a glass is half full.

A pessimist will say that the glass is half empty.

An engineer will say that the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.

The physicist will point out to them that they are all wrong, because the glass is quite full:  half with liquid, half with air!

And why not pick on engineers a bit:

Three professionals, a mathematician, a physicist and an engineer, took their final test for the job. The sole question in the exam was “how much is one plus one”.

The math dude asked the receptionist for a ream of paper, two hours later, he said: I have proven its a natural number

The physicist, after checking parallax error and quantum tables said: its between 1.9999999999, and 2.0000000001

The engineer quickly said: oh! its easy! its two,…. no, better make it three, just to be safe.

And a bit more:

During the French revolution a priest, a drunk and an engineer are sent to the guillotine. They ask the priest if he wants to face up or down when he meets his fate. The priest says he would like to face up so he will be looking towards heaven when he dies. They raise the blade of the guillotine and release it. It comes speeding down and suddenly stops just inches from his neck. The authorities take this as divine intervention and release the priest.

The drunkard comes to the guillotine next. He also decides to die face up, hoping that he will be as fortunate as the priest. They raise the blade of the guillotine and release it. It comes speeding down and suddenly stops just inches from his neck. Again, the authorities take this as a sign of divine intervention, and they release the drunkard as well.

Next is the engineer. He, too, decides to die facing up. As they slowly raise the blade of the guillotine, the engineer suddenly says, “Hey, I see what your problem is …”

Posted in Humour. Tags: . 1 Comment »

Friday’s joke

Shamelessly lifted from reddit:

Two roommates work in a laboratory outside of Hamilton, Ontario. Steve, a regular fellow, and Gork, a literal caveman. He puts on a button-down shirt and tie every day in an attempt to fit in, but he just can’t stop being a knuckle-dragging caveman (albeit in a lab coat).

After several years of working there, some of Gork’s coworkers are talking during a coffee break. “Gork strikes me as really weird,” said one man, “He’s been here at the lab for like 6 years, and he never really developed any manners. I figured he would be civilized by now.”

Another coworker takes a sip of his coffee, thinks for a minute, and says, “Well, I suppose you really can’t expect him to evolve. He commutes with the Hamiltonian.”

And talking about commuting:

Heisenberg and Shrodinger are commuting to work together, when they get pulled over for speeding.  The police officer walks up to the driver’s window and accusingly says to Heisenberg:  “You were going 140 km/h!”

Heisenberg throws his hands up in disgust and exclaims:  “Great!  Now I’m lost!”

The cop finds this a suspicious answer, so he walks around to the other side, peering into the back seat along the way.  When he gets to Shrodinger’s window, he asks him:  “Did you know that there is a dead cat in the back seat?”

Schrodinger answers:  “Now I do!”

I can’t resist a few one-liners:

–  How many moles are there in guacamole?  Avocado’s number!

–  A bar walks up to a physicist.  Hey, wait – that’s the wrong frame of reference!

–  And then, a dyslexic walks into a bra…

– What do you get when you put root beer in a square glass? A beer.

– There’s a band called 1023MB. They haven’t had any gigs yet.

– How can you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce unionized.

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Thursday’s joke

Shamelessly lifted from reddit:

Forty days pass, the flood recedes, and Noah and his family are settling in. Noah’s wife notices that all the animals are starting to reproduce, except for a pair of snakes. She asks Noah about it, and he says he’ll take care of it.

A week later, Noah brings his wife out to the workshop, and shows her the snakes in their basket on top of the picnic table he just built.

“How is this going to get them to reproduce?” she asks.

“Trust me,” he replies.

A few days after that, she notices there are eggs in the basket. She is delighted, and asks Noah how the picnic table could have possibly helped.

He says, “My dear, even adders can multiply on a log table.”

While on the topic of geeky math jokes:

There’s this calculus party, and all the functions are invited.

ln(x) is talking to some trig functions, when he sees his friend ex sulking in a corner.

ln(x): “What’s wrong ex?”

ex: “I’m so lonely!”

ln(x): “Well, you should go integrate yourself into the crowd!”

ex looks up and cries, “It won’t make a difference!”

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